Raging inferno
Trying to stop the raging inferno of desire can be a very difficult challenge indeed. The means by which we can quell the flames is simply the mind. The mind will almost always succumb to the raging fire. The mind wants to succumb because that is the nature of desire. I want my reasons for going out drinking to outweigh my reasons for staying in, because that is the nature of desire. So, at best, when we are trying to douse the inferno, we are doing so with one part petrol, one part water.
The act of trying to put out the fire is itself not without exertion. It’s painful, it’s tiring, it’s stressful. Often it causes us to think badly of ourselves, to chastise ourselves. The power of desire is exaggerated by the fact that when you give in to it you are no longer suffering the pain of trying to quell it.
If it’s a Friday night and my friends call from the pub asking me to join them for a drink my dopamine levels (inferno) will rise. Then I’ll have a back and forth in my mind. On the one hand will be the Devil with all the reasons I should go out drinking; I worked hard all week, work hard play hard, ease the stress, don’t want to let down my friends, I’ll just have a couple, it will be a laugh, remember the last time we went out. And on the other hand the Saint; I said I was going to stay off the booze, I need to get to the gym tomorrow, you really are a weak piece of shit if you go out drinking again etc. Eventually I give in to the inferno, go out, get pissed, have a laugh, and experience a horrible hangover the following day.
An alternative strategy would be to try to prevent the inferno from catching hold in the first place. So maybe when it’s midweek and I don’t usually drink (I find it amazing how dopamine knows when it’s Friday) I can practice some mind games. My mind will let me play these mind games now because the desire is not there, or at least is tempered.
The first mind game I play is simply to focus on and exaggerate the negatives of drinking. I will refer to alcohol as poison. I picture myself vomiting after taking the first sip of beer. I picture myself in a pathetic state the following day, lying on the sofa, kind of pooled on the sofa, with a remote in my hand desperately trying to find something worth watching on TV or YouTube.
The second mind game I play is to mirror my response to something that I don’t desire. For instance, I have never taken cocaine, so when I think about taking cocaine, I don’t notice any particularly strong feelings at all. My dopamine doesn’t spike, the inferno doesn’t rage. I just kind of give it a shrug. I imagine someone offering me cocaine. How does my body react? How does my face react? What words do I use to decline the offer? I then picture my friends inviting me out for a drink and I mimic my reactions to the offer of cocaine.